Unas Calamitas Singulas

Safe and sound...

2009-12-21T04:08:26Z

in Allllllllllll-buquerque!

I T'aint Deade

2009-12-15T18:47:55Z

And to prove it, here's a recipe.

Beer Bread

Ingredients:
* 3 cups self-rising flour
* Pinch of salt to taste
* 1/2 cup sugar
* 12 ounces good ale or stout
* 2 tablespoons melted butter

Optional: (choose no more than three)
* Herbs - No more than 3 tsp total
* Cheese - No more than a grated cup of any block cheese
* Dried fruits - No more than 1/2 cup, diced small
* Nuts - No more than 3/4 cup, chopped small
* Nut meal - Replace up to 1/2 cup of flour with some kind of nut meal.

Directions:

1) Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

2) Butter a metal loaf pan and set aside.

3) In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugar, and beer and mix well. Add any optional herbs, fruits, or cheese as well The mixture should be very sticky.

4) If you are adding nuts, add them after the batter is wet and sticky or you'll end up with floury nuts in your loaf.

5) Stop snickering about "floury nuts".

6) Pour batter into the loaf pan and bake for 55 minutes.

7) At the last 5 minutes of baking, remove from oven, brush the top of the loaf with butter and return to oven.

Note: Use a dark beer, like Guinness or other stout, if you are pairing the bread with hearty beef stews. Use a regular ale, pale ale, or lager if you pairing with tomato, chicken, or pork-based foods. Budweiser and Coors are not allowed.

Comedy Semi Finals

2009-04-06T16:22:24Z

I'll be competing in the semi-finals at Rooster T. Feathers on April 15th in Sunnyvale.

Show starts at 8pm. I've got some free tickets if y'all want to come.

Chow,
Mike

http://www.roostertfeathers.com

Oakland Comedy

2009-02-24T15:54:31Z

I'm doing a show at a bar on Alameda (near Oakland) this Thursday. The place is called the Fire Den Bar & Grill. Here's a map: http://www.google.com/maps?q=1231+Park+Street,+Alameda,+CA+94501,+USA

This is a real show (not an endless open mic) and I know most of the comics I'll be appearing with. It's gonna be a funny-ass show and worth the effort.

Believe me, I wouldn't drive all the way up there if I thought it was gonna be crappy.

Comedy Competition

2009-01-29T21:48:32Z

I'll be performing on Wednesday, February 18th at 8PM, at Rooster T. Feathers in Sunnyvale.
This is the preliminary round of the South Bay Comedy Competition and I could really use your support. This is the fairest of all the competitions, but I still need as many supporters as possible. If you've been holding out for my one big show, this is it. If I do well in this mother, I've got something good to put on my resume.
As usual, I've got free tickets and drinkypoos for my peeps!
Call for reservations at:
408-736-0921
Rooster T. Feathers Comedy Club
157 W. El Camino Real
Sunnyvale, CA 94087
www.roostertfeathers.com

Trying Something New

2009-01-11T07:44:56Z

I'm going to try making English Muffins a la Alton Brown, as shown in the clip below. The English muffin part starts about 5 minutes in. This post is mostly so I can find the clip quickly.

Feel free to join in.

Ingredients

* 1/2 cup non-fat powdered milk
* 1 tablespoon sugar
* 1 teaspoon salt
* 1 tablespoon shortening
* 1 cup hot water
* 1 envelope dry yeast
* 1/8 teaspoon sugar
* 1/3 cup warm water
* 2 cups all-purpose flour, sifted
* Non-stick vegetable spray
* Special equipment: electric griddle, 3-inch metal rings, see Cook's Note*

Directions

In a bowl combine the powdered milk, 1 tablespoon of sugar, 1/2 teaspoon of salt, shortening, and hot water, stir until the sugar and salt are dissolved. Let cool. In a separate bowl combine the yeast and 1/8 teaspoon of sugar in 1/3 cup of warm water and rest until yeast has dissolved. Add this to the dry milk mixture. Add the sifted flour and beat thoroughly with wooden spoon. Cover the bowl and let it rest in a warm spot for 30 minutes.

Preheat the griddle to 300 degrees F.

Add the remaining 1/2 teaspoon of salt to mixture and beat thoroughly. Place metal rings onto the griddle and coat lightly with vegetable spray. Using #20 ice cream scoop, place 2 scoops into each ring and cover with a pot lid or cookie sheet and cook for 5 to 6 minutes. Remove the lid and flip rings using tongs. Cover with the lid and cook for another 5 to 6 minutes or until golden brown. Place on a cooling rack, remove rings and cool. Split with fork and serve.

*Cook's Note: Small tuna cans with tops and bottoms removed work well for metal rings.

On the Radio, On the Radio...

2008-11-13T22:55:33Z

Hey y'all,

I'm going to be on the radio tomorrow evening from 8-9PM. http://www.knry.com/ProgramSchedules.htm.

Ciao!
Mike

Tommy T's Cancelled

2008-09-22T16:43:25Z

Hey all,

My tendonitis is flaring up and I can't walk. I'm skipping Tommy T's tonight.

Hope you didn't buy a fancy dress to see me, especially you, Dave.

OK, now that's funny.... Cuz it's true.

2008-09-20T14:54:39Z

Blue Lagoon

2008-09-05T05:10:49Z

Had a great set at the Blue Lagoon tonight!

Lindsay Blaz has brought together a good room, the students are back from summer break, and I destroyed the room. All new material too. I'm very pleased.

Update:
I did so well last night, this morning I've been pondering what the format of my TV sitcom will be.

SHUT UP! It coud happen!

Cheers!
Mike

Bad Mummy!

2008-08-27T04:42:20Z

Went to see the latest Mummy movie. If you're thinking of going, don't. Wow, what a stinker!

Bad actors, bad acting, bad script, bad premise, bad, bad, and bad.

How bad? DnD Movie Bad.

The Food Verboten

2008-08-24T00:39:42Z

I didn't feel like cooking, so I fell back on that old stand-by, Chili Mac.

Yeah, mac&cheese with a can of chili thrown in.

Except... I didn't have any milk, so I used whipping cream.

It actually made Chili Mac taste good. I think I broke the Fourth Seal.

Blue Lagoon on Aug 14th.

2008-08-10T04:13:44Z

More comedy from me, more comedy for you. Free admission, no minimum.

Blue Lagoon
920 S. Pacific
Santa Cruz, CA

Be there! Aloha!

Red Bull

2008-08-07T06:32:19Z

I had a couple Red Bulls before the show tonight. Much more upbeat, more energy, LOTS more laughs (even after following three boring comics.)

I also listened to my iPod during the bad comics to keep my energy up. There's nothing worse than watching some wannabe kill the room right before you go up.

Anyways, Red Bulls and iPod go in the gig bag from now on.

Bubba

Weekend

2008-08-03T22:12:07Z

Not much going on here.

Yesterday we started on cleaning out the storage locker. I want to get rid of that bill. We sorted through the closets and decided what was going into bins and what was going to charity.

This morning we got up early and went to the Farmer's Market. One guy had peaches the size of softballs. Very yummy too.

One gripe about the market is I see an awful lot of wholesale boxes. I doubt any of them are actual farmers.

This afternoon, another run to the regular store for this week's lunches and such.

My back is killing me after all this walking on concrete, but I'm having to stop because of being tired, just the pain. The pain will go away after a while. I went through this last year when I started walking again.

How you like them apples?

2008-07-31T04:28:13Z

I made applesauce tonight.

I used ABs applesauce recipe from way back in the Cretaceous period, er, second season.

I am appalled at how well it came out and how easy it was.

Lick-smacking good. Lick the bowl clean good.

When was the last time you said that about applesauce?

3 Fuji apples
3 Golden Delicious apples (peeled, cored, and sliced)
1 cup apple juice (I used Martinelli's)
2 TB butter (Yes, butter)
2 TB congac (Yes, CONGAC!)
3 TB honey
1 TB cinnamon
pinch of salt.

Throw everything in a large saucepan and simmer for about 30-40 minutes. Then use your stick blender to get the right consistency.

It'll come out darker than the insipid baby-food you get at the store. But O M G! It is so good.

This Makes Bubba Happy

2008-07-26T13:59:29Z

Kill Bill

2008-07-22T18:48:17Z

I'm watching Kill Bill and I have to say, he's a hokey writer and a bit of a thief, but he has the sense to get the best actors and let them do their stuff.

Show Report

2008-07-18T14:58:17Z

Last night was my first performance at the Blue Lagoon Comedy Night in Santa Cruz.

I must say, I'm impressed with how Lindsay Blaz has pulled together a little comedy club in the back room. It's a room separate from the main bar, lights are low, little candles on the tables, fairly comfortable chairs for the guests, good stage, etc.

I had a good show, I think. Did about 15 minutes of solid comedy, got good laughs, without having to scrounge for material. I would have done more, but I wasn't getting paid and we had an appointment for a hot tub at the Spa a block over, so I wrapped it up.

It was nice that there wasn't a shopping list of comics. Only about 6, I think. And Lindsay isn't really running timed sets. Basically, you could just go as long as you want, and when you were done, you're done. It's a nice change. Takes a lot of the pressure off. I think she only does a light when someone is really bombing.

Anyway, next show is August 6th at Roosters, unless I do the Blue Lagoon again next week. I just love hot tubs. :)

Lightly Vulgar?

2008-07-16T19:35:04Z

Your result for The 3 Variable Funny Test...

the Idiot Savant

your humor style:
VULGAR | SPONTANEOUS | LIGHT

You like things silly, immediate, and, above all, outrageous. Ixne on the subtle word play, more testicles on fire, please. People like you are the most likely to RECEIVE internet forwards--and also the most likely to save them in a special folder entitled 'HOLY SHIT'.

Because it's so easily appreciated, and often wacky and physical, your sense of humor never ceases to amuse your friends. Most realize that there's a sly intelligence and a knowing wink to your tastes. Your sense of humor could be called 'anti-pretentious'--but paradoxically enough, that indicates you're smarter than most.

PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Johnny Knoxville - Jimmy Kimmel

The 3-Variable Funny Test!

- it rules -

Take The 3 Variable Funny Test at HelloQuizzy

Pretty Good Weekend

2008-07-14T16:27:19Z

We had a pretty good weekend. We went grocery shpooing for the first time in about a month, so we ended up dropping $200. We needed EVERYTHING...

I accidentally spilled a mug of tea into my keyboard (bound to happen) so I had to buy a new one. I went to Best Buy and WAS FORCED to buy a wireless keyboard and mouse combo. Why? Because that's all they had except for a crappy, flimsy, shitty keyboard from a Chinese Communist manufacturer. Fucking savages! ARGH! I don't like wireless keyboards. It's just one more thing that can go wrong.

So far, I haven't been doing well on the treadmill. I was up to just over a mile a few months ago. I'm back to only being able to cover a 1/3 of a mile before my back forces me to stop. God damn it all to fucking hell. Of course, when I first started I could get maybe a 100 yards, so I haven't backslid ALL the way. Damn it, damn it, damn it.

I made some sloppy joes for dinner last night (my own recipe, not that crap from a can, thankyouverymuch).

Meme Time

2008-07-13T16:58:26Z

This counts as a post, right?

What Kind of a Western Bad-Ass are You?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as John Wayne

You a classic all American cowboy who does the right thing. When you're sober. Which means occasionally. You like horses, the outdoors, whiskey, hot tempered women, whiskey, and bourbon.

John Wayne

75%

Clint Eastwood

63%

Charles Bronson

63%

Lee Marvin

63%

Lee Van Cleef

50%

Now that's funny!

2008-07-08T04:45:09Z

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2249859/Tofu-%27might-harm-memory-in-elderly%27.html

Investment

2008-07-06T20:46:07Z

Well, I've finally took the plunge. We laid down a big wad of cash and bought our own treadmill.

Treadmills are the only exercise I can tolerate, and if I have it at home I'll use because then I can watch TV shows guilt-free.

Yeah, that's fucked up. But I know me.

More later.

And a River Runs Through It...

2008-07-01T01:21:33Z

While we were in Arkansas we had a lot of rain. Tish got some great shots of the river that runs through the back of our property...

Oh yeah, that's why I'm working my ass off.

Mike